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    Stuck On Repeat ( Part 1: Pre Credits )


    FADE IN

    INT. SITTING ROOM - DAY

    Sitting on a couch interview style are two brothers, mid forties, big hair, bandana’s. They look like throwbacks from an 80’s rock group. They are ageing rockers, The Jones Brothers

    JOHN TWO SHEDS JONES
    Yeah man, everyone remembers where they were the first time they heard that album. How could you not? No one had heard music like that before. I was driving down to the local shops to pick up some toilet paper, and the first track, “Dirty Little Secret” came on the radio. I nearly crashed the car. I couldn’t take my eyes off it.

    (His brother Jimmy sitting beside him looks confused.)

    JIMMY BACK-BACON JONES
    Why would you be looking at the radio?.

    JOHN TWO SHEDS JONES
    I just couldn’t believe the sound coming out. I kept turning it on and off, on and off. I had to make sure I wasn’t tripping out. That’s happened before you know. Once while driving I heard the entire Abbey Road album. I look down and the radio wasn’t even on. In fact, I wasn’t even sitting in a car.

    JIMMY BACK-BACON JONES
    I was in the toilet waiting for you to come back with the toilet roll. It was blaring out of the living room stereo. I crab walked out to turn it up, but when I got there the song was over. Then you crashed the car through the window.

    INT. RECORDING STUDIO - NIGHT
    A sound engineer, wearing a beard and cap. Looks a little like Elvis Costello, sits holding his hands together with the mixing desk behind him.

    TERRY PANTS
    So get this, Big Tom right, he walks in, throws a wad of cash on the table and says, “I’m here to record the greatest album of all time. All you need to do is press the record button”. The four of them walked in, laid down the tracks and left. Before I could even finish my coffee, the album was number one. Well, not literally, But yeah, literally.

    INT. OFFICE - DAY
    A large grey haired man sits behind a desk, nicely dressed with a bright orange fake tan. He is Harry Hays, owner of Red Sauce Records. Gold and platinum records on the wall behind him.

    HARRY HAYS
    I’m lying in bed, must have been three in the morning when I hear music coming through the bedroom window. It was like nothing I’d ever heard before. So I jumped out of bed, looked out, and there they were. Standing around this piece of shit car with music blaring out of it. They were holding up a sign that said, “We want a record deal”. Normally I’d just call the cops and have them shot but instead I called my lawyer and got him to bring over some contracts. By breakfast they were mine. I had just signed “Four More”, the soon to be greatest band of all time. Well that was of course, until they screwed it all up.

    INT. HALLWAY - NIGHT
    We see an old man, white beard, bald head. We see the top half only. He is wearing a blue denim shirt with his name on it.

    RANDOM GUY
    Yes I remember it. It was the biggest pile of shit I’ve ever heard.

    MAN (O.S.)
    Hey you, get back to work.

    (We pull out to see that he is a janitor holding a mop and bucket. He moves off quickly and cleans the floors. The song “Blitzkrieg Bop” by the Ramones starts.)

    ROLL CREDITS

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    Posted 8 months ago.



    Post views: 228
  • Comments

    1. mdoll

      A very enjoyable read.


      Posted 8 months ago