• Writer: Boris Johnson

  1. Lord Of The Rings Samwise Gamgee Says Sorry For Crying All The Way Mordor


    We all have that friend, the one who’s not really up for the road trip but insists on coming along anyway. The one who moans all the way and keeps asking are we there yet. The one who opens a bag of teriyaki flavored beef jerky and stinks out the car.

    Frodo Baggins has such a friend and his na...

    Read Me See More


    Posted 8 months ago.


  2. Wife Sees Husband Having Fun And Thinks, I Must Put A Stop To That


    Berta Beeswax came home today to find her husband and his friends sitting on the couch drinking beer and watching a movie. They appeared to her to be having fun and she thought to herself, “That's not on”. She decided it most important to put a stop to it immediately. “How can he just sit there a...

    Read Me See More


    Posted 8 months ago.


  3. Wife Calls Husbands Name From Other Room Immediately Starting Unnecessary Row


    Passed down from mother to daughter through the generations, modern woman has the ability to call a man’s name from another room and immediately fill him with fear. His mind frantically scanning for what he could have done. For what could be in the other room that she needs him to see so urgently...

    Read Me See More


    Posted 9 months ago.


  4. Recent College Graduate Yet To Receive Job Offer Despite Sending Out Four Resumes


    A recent college graduate is said to be left devastated after receiving not a single call back despite emailing his resume to four different companies. "When I left college, I thought I would walk into a job with a starting salary of at least 40k plus benefits" said Alex, 22.

    "I honestly thou...

    Read Me See More


    Posted 9 months ago.


  5. Woman Admits To Not Understanding Any Of The Motivational Quotes She Reposts On Facebook


    “I’m a lover not a fighter, but I'll fight for what I love,” and “Shoot for the moon. Even if you fail, you’ll land among the stars,” are just two of a vast range of inane gibberish that gets reposted daily by millennials in a vague attempt to sound more mature and interesting than they actually ...

    Read Me See More


    Posted 9 months ago.


  6. New Parents Shocked To Discover Nobody Wants To See Photos Of Their Children


    Doting parents Ted and Elaine awoke this morning to the realization that not one of their friends wanted to see photos of their kids and really couldn’t give a tuppenny fuck about the school play they were in the previous night.

    For years Ted and Elaine (mainly Elaine) have been posting photo...

    Read Me See More


    Posted 9 months ago.


  7. Knight From ‘Indiana Jones And The Last Crusade’ Admits He Made A Piss Poor Effort At Defending The Holy Grail.


    If you have ever seen ‘Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade’, you will remember Indiana fighting off the Nazis, a tank and some sword wielding Arabs on his way to the temple where the Holy Grail was housed. Forced then to pass three tests of skill, faith and strength, he arrives in the Grail room t...

    Read Me See More


    Posted 9 months ago.